divorce, Arlington Heights divorce lawyerAnyone who has ever been in a serious relationship can probably relate. The initial stages of the relationship are filled with happiness and excitement at the very thought of one another. While nobody expects the “puppy-love” phase to last forever, it is during this stage that many couples decide to get married. As time goes by, however, the relationship may cool into a less dramatic and intense type of love, and, in some cases, even further than that. Eventually, one or both spouses may find themselves feeling bored, lonely, and unloved despite the rings on their fingers. Some may be inclined to take immediate action and file for divorce, but rushing toward the end of your marriage is not usually the best idea.

Relationship Cycles

Your relationship is going to be constantly changing. Life does not stand still and neither does love. Even the healthiest of marriages have rough patches. There is a reason that the typical wedding vows include the phrases “for better or for worse,” “in good times and in bad,” and “in sickness and in health.” If you took the leap of faith to marry your spouse, you believed that your love was deeper than physical attraction and good feelings. Before you decide to file for divorce, take an objective look at your marriage and try to determine it is really over or if you are just going through a tough time.

Divorce is Life-Changing

The decision to get married is a very significant one. The decision to get divorced is equally significant. Both represent a drastic change in the way that you will live the rest of your life. If you have children, your decision to divorce will impact more than just you and your spouse. Your children will be forced to adapt to an entirely new lifestyle. While divorce is not uncommon, it is important to think about how the process and its outcome could affect every member of your family.

You Could Be Wrong

When you look back on your life in 20 years, you should be able to see that you made the right decision. If you rush into a divorce, will you regret not having done enough to try to save your marriage? Of course, if you have already done everything possible, then divorce might be the right choice, but you owe to your future self to be absolutely certain.

If you are considering a divorce in Illinois, an experienced Rolling Meadows divorce lawyer can provide the guidance you need in making good decisions. Call Cosley Law Office today at 847-253-3100 for a free, no-obligation consultation with a member of our team. We will explain your options and work with you in achieving the happier future you deserve.





Posted in Divorce | Tagged , , , , ,

wedding date, Arlington Heights divorce attorneyAre you the type of person who sees repeating numbers on a digital clock—4:44 pm, for example—and encourages your friends to make a wish? Perhaps the question is particularly relevant considering today’s calendar date of 11/11. A large number of people find significance in patterns found in numbers, while, for many others, such patterns inspire curious, coincidental amusement. In fact, couples around the world intentionally choose dates with numerical patterns to celebrate their wedding ceremonies. However, a new study suggests that those who get married on gimmicky dates divorce nearly a third more often than those who marry on ordinary days.

Special Days and Regular Days

A team of economists from Australia’s University of Melbourne wanted to see if there was any connection between a couple’s wedding date and the likelihood of their divorce. Previous studies have looked at the size and cost of a wedding, as well as impact that age, remarriage, and children may have on the probably of divorce, but the researchers believed that they were the first to examine the calendar date of the wedding itself.

The team identified several types of dates that were considered to be “special” based on the way they could be written, including:

  • Dates with repeating numbers, such as 1/1/11 and 9/9/09;
  • Dates with sequential numbers, such as 7/8/09 and 9/10/11; and
  • Dates with mirror numbers, such as, using European date convention, 20/10/2010.

For the purposes of the project, the researchers also included Valentine’s Day as a special day.

More Marriages, More Divorce

All told, the team examined more than 1 million marriages between the years 1999 and 2013. They found that, on an average, non-special day, about 200 marriages took place. On a special day, the average number of couples to get married jumped to more than 630. The romance of marrying on a special day, however, was not enough for many couples, as special-day marriages were up to 36 percent more likely to end in divorce than non-special day marriages.

While divorce is often the result of a multitude of problems, the researchers speculated about the link between a wedding date and the success or failure of a marriage. They surmised that it was not so much about the date itself, as it was about what choosing a quirky or novelty date says about a couple’s relationship. Could it be that those who select a special date for their wedding are more likely to worry about relatively trivial things, taking some of the focus away from maintaining a healthy marriage?

Contact a Rolling Meadows Divorce Lawyer

Whether you celebrated a special-day wedding or not, if you are facing a divorce, you need an advocate who fight to protect your rights throughout the process. Call 847-253-3100 for a free consultation with an experienced Arlington Heights divorce attorney at Cosley Law Office today.





Posted in Divorce | Tagged , , , , , ,

dads, Rolling Meadows family law attorneyWhile fathers have always played an important role in the upbringing and development of children, they have not always been treated as such by the courts. This was often due to the assignment of traditional gender roles. Further, it was originally thought that the mother was more critical in the child’s early years. Yet, as time passed, fathers began to gain some important recognition in the lives of their children. The composition of families also started to change. Now there are fathers who stay home with their children and mothers who work outside of the home. Does this necessarily affect the allocation of parental responsibilities or assignment of parenting time in divorce though? It is possible but not guaranteed.

How Child-Related Matters Are Determined

In Illinois, divorcing parents are permitted to negotiate an agreement regarding the allocation of parental responsibilities and parenting time details of their case. Generally, this offers numerous benefits for families, including the freedom to create a parenting plan that is more tailored to their family’s specific needs. For example, if the couple feels the child and family would benefit most from the father receiving a greater allocation of parental responsibilities and parenting time because he works from home, they could create and agree upon a parenting plan that reflects this decision.

Not all divorcing couples are able to agree upon child-related matters, however. Further, not all families should attempt negotiation (i.e. situations involving domestic violence). In these cases, the allocation of parental responsibilities and parenting time are decided by the courts. To make this determination, the judge will look at a number of factors to determine the best interests of the child, including:

  • Wishes and needs of the child;
  • Wishes of each parent;
  • Child’s involvement and adjustment to school, community, and home;
  • Each parent’s willingness to encourage a healthy and ongoing relationship with the other parent;
  • Previous agreements regarding decision-making of the child;
  • Each parent’s prior involvement in the child’s daily upbringing;
  • Ability of the parents to cooperate and make decisions in the best interest of their child;
  • Distance between each parent’s residence and any difficulties in transporting the child;
  • Physical violence or threat of violence from either parent;
  • Neglect or abuse against the child or against another member of the household;
  • Mental, physical, and emotional health of all parties involved;
  • If one of the parents is a convicted sex offender (and how that may impact the safety of the child; and
  • Any other factors that the court deems relevant.

What This Means for Stay-at-Home Dads

While, on one hand, a judge might consider granting a stay-at-home dad a greater allocation of parental responsibilities and parenting time, this may not always be the case. If, for example, the stay-at-home dad has a substance abuse problem that essentially required the mother to work to support the family, this could be used as a factor against him. This may not necessarily be the case, of course, since every situation and family is different. However, it is important to note that there are many factors that go into determining which parent receives the greatest allocation of parenting time and parental responsibilities.

Contact Our Experienced Family Law Attorneys

Divorce is a complex matter, legally and emotionally speaking. Our skilled Rolling Meadows parental responsibilities lawyers can help you manage the issues you are facing while also ensuring that your rights, and the rights of your child, are protected. Schedule your free consultation with us today to learn more.





Posted in Stay-at-Home Dads | Tagged , , , , , ,